How I Live Now

How I Live Now

There were a couple things I struggled with reading this book. Certain things did not seem believable to me - for example, the way the children lived on a regular basis (before the war and initially after it began) seemed very false/odd. I couldn’t buy into it - not sure why but I struggled. It just seemed like someone would have been very bothered that children were living on their own and want to intervene somehow. Also, the swiftness of Daisy’s retrieval after the phone call seemed unbelievable. Here her father is, several thousands of miles away, and even if he had people there working for him, it would take a bit longer to get to Daisy and she could have fled by then. Plus - it was so sudden, so abrupt, and without the slightest warning Daisy and the readers were torn away from that life then and thrown into her other life in the States - and neither Daisy, nor myself as the reader, wanted to be there. I hated that part and because of that I had a hard time accepting that scene as believable. At the same time - I had no problem with the idea that Edmund could read minds, that the two of them communicated while apart, and that all the cousins had some “special” skills. Not sure if it is the author’s style, lack of details, or what that leads me to buy into the nearly impossible and question the quite probable.
Another area I had issues with was the relationship between Daisy and Edmund. Perhaps it is that our time period and culture (in most areas in the US) are not in favor of cousins becoming romantic. More than likely it is because I have grown up with over 30 cousins and have NEVER thought of any of them in a way other than family. I realize she had not grown up with them and they were all strangers until they met - but still - they are cousins and I struggle with that. Also, their ages at the onset of their relationship seems way too young for such a relationship to develop. I am quite aware that kids are physical at younger and younger ages, but this just threw me for a loop. If it was just their ages I may not have rejected their relationship like I did - but when you combine their age with the fact they are cousins...couldn’t get past it. On one level I liked them and very much wanted them both to live and be happy; on the other hand I kept waiting for one or both of them to acknowledge their wrong doings and feel guilt or regret.
When I read the last page, the last line, I found myself thinking, “That’s it?” I put the book down and just thought for a bit. The last line is the title - which is a perfectly wonderful title for the book and life; still, I wanted answers. I wanted to know what was really wrong with Edmund? What happened next? Why didn’t she come back sooner? Contact him/them in some way? Why did the author write this? What was the intent? Is there some bigger message here I am totally missing? How would my students react to this? Would the details of the war be too much for them? Why doesn’t that bother me more? Is anyone else bothered by their relationship? Am I a huge prude that their age shocks me?
The more questions I asked, the more I respected the book. I wasn’t asking the questions because it was poorly written, I was asking the questions because it made me think about a lot - I thought about the story, the author, myself and I am still thinking. I guess that impresses me. Like The Absolutely True Diary of a Part Time Indian, this books leaves many loose ends, many things to consider about others and yourself. For that, I have to admit, I liked reading this book and think it would spark a number of conversations on a variety of topics.

the first part last by Angela Johnson

Stereotypes and judgements - wow this book does an excellent job making the reader look at those things.  While reading the first part last, (actually the judgements started before I read the first word - it started when I looked at the cover of a boy and a baby) I found myself thinking the main character, Bobby, was foolish, selfish, crazy, and a number of other negative things.  Just looking at the cover, my mind wandered and I imagined I knew the story just b/c the character was young and black - in fact, because he was male I was puzzled for a moment and thought he was “stuck” b/c the mom must have wanted to keep the baby.  Wow!  I am not a racist person - I believe everyone deserves to be treated with dignity, respect, and love regardless of their gender, race, class, age, or anything else.  People are people; yet here I am prejudging the character before I even read a single word.  How many people in our world do that on a regular basis?  Myself included!  Unlike most situations in real life where judging occurs, the first part last gives readers the details, the answers, the real story from the boy’s/father’s perspective and makes the reader (or at least it made me) acutely aware of how seldom  people really know the entire story.  The reader, the characters (like the teacher or people on the bus) have no clue what the entire story entails; and therefore they judge the entire situation, misread the people involved, and walk away with their mind made up - their stereotypes strengthened - and no clue how wrong they might be (or in this case are).

As I read, I kept waiting for the NOW chapter that included the Nia’s reasoning for abandoning her child.  As I got closer and closer to the end I was waiting for the two of them to fight, kept waiting for an explanation as to why she would just walk away.  I found myself really disliking her for leaving Bobby and Feather.  I was also waiting for Bobby to change his mind and give Feather back (I even judged to choice of names - thought how immature to name a child that...I felt like such a jerk when I got to the end).  I was impressed by his mother’s determination to let Bobby live with his choice (tough love); I was disappointed by his father’s passive approach to the situation, thought he babied his son.  While reading I got frustrated by some of Bobby’s choices thinking - grow up!  How immature!  You are a father.  and the next chapter thinking, “well, he is just a kid trying to do so much - cut him some slack.”  I contradicted myself throughout.  

When I got to the end I was completely caught off guard.  Felt like such a b*$#@ for all the things I thought about Bobby, about Nia, was mad at Bobby’s mom and liked his father.  At the end I completely understood Bobby keeping Feather.  And then...I thought that really, nothing changed about Bobby’s situation other than it got worse.  When Nia was there to help, they knew they shouldn’t keep the baby.  Now he has to go at it alone and he decides to keep her - what is he thinking.  Again - the questions this book brings up are endless.  

I kept thinking this would be a wonderful discussion piece for students.  Reading this could bring out discussions about stereotypes, choices, values, how you look at others when they make decisions, can circumstances change what the “right” thing to do is.  Is everything right/wrong, black/white, good/bad.  How would the story change if the characters were white?  another race?  another class?  What would those people have for options - does that change what is right/wrong.  

Some random things:

On page 103, Bobby’s mom says, “I don’t think you and your brother could have stood two parents like me.”   This line shows that people are not perfect, most know their faults, and regardless of who you are, you have to be true what what you think is right, even if you maybe don’t like it.  

Does anyone wonder why Nia’s parents do not want a more active role in the life of their grandbaby?  I realize they were not terribly involved with Nia - but they loved her and wanted a good life for her - one would imagine they would want a part of her - which would be Feather.

Switching back and forth between then and now, as Johnson does throughout the book, seems a much better format than chronological.  For one, the same effect would be lost if written chronologically - she did have to write the first part last in order to have the readers determine everything before they knew anything.  This style of writing out of order has become more popular in the past several years or so.  Jodi Picoult does this nearly every time she writes a novel.  The Time Traveler’s Wife is a good example.  James Patterson does as well.  This is by no means a new way of writing but it is becoming more evident.  Some people may struggle with this style or format (those who are very structured or focused - the nonmulti-taskers of the world) but in a novel like this one it is necessary and powerful.  Students/readers who have short attention spans will appreciate this b/c it keeps going back and forth - jumping from one place to the next - never getting dull b/c the reader is always trying to figure things out/piece things together.  

The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian

As I began reading The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian, I must admit I was skeptical. I was not in the mood to read a depressing book and believed, based on the title, that the book would focus on struggling with identity in a way that would leave me feeling terrible. Perhaps I have read too many books lately that did just that, leaving me with feelings of very little hope. The main character of this book, Junior, paints a very realistic picture (I believe) in that he shares the realities of his life – the terrible, the unfair, and the wonderful and comical. Often, when I have read books and short stories focusing on diverse cultures, there is very little humor/laughter/positive involved. Those books left me, as a reader, feeling guilty and hopeless; the way Alexie wrote this novel, complete with wonderful illustrations, I felt sadness at times and laughed out loud at others. Isn’t that how life is? What would the world do without some comic relief? For example, during his grandmother’s funeral, when the millionaire Ted returns her powwow garment (after a lengthy speech) and Junior’s mom tells him her mother never danced and two thousand Indians laughed, Junior states, “And I realized that, sure, Indians were drunk and sad and displaced and crazy and mean, but, dang, we knew how to laugh” (167). Alexie seems to keep a good balance of positive and negative and makes the story seem more “real” as a result.
The book reminds me of a poem I have taught in class – one that I have been searching for everywhere for the past few days (and hope I find before I need it). Anyhow, this poem is written by a young Black female who grew up to be quite successful. It basically says that when people interview her, they ask her how it was growing up black and poor in America and all the (white) people who interview her write about are the struggles – the times without food or electricity, the parents who are always gone (because they are working two or more jobs), and all the negatives. But, she states in the poem, she was loved, and happy, and felt cared for – but no one ever writes about that because the authors can’t fathom that in the midst of poverty and oppression there can be joy and someone can actually be happy. Instead they write how she came from “nothing,” which isn’t the case at all. This book showed the joy, no matter how little it may seem to others, and it is so important to express that as well.
What hit home the most in reading was the rejection Junior received from the members of the tribe once he went to Reardon. Where I teach, students usually stay in the class structure in which they were born. Some very bright students who are of the lower working class have opted to stay in town and work rather than going to college. Those that do go to college are often rejected by their lifelong friends – it isn’t as concrete/obvious/in-your-face as the book, but it is evident. Junior feels guilty for leaving and trying to better himself; the majority of his tribe feels betrayed and would rather ridicule Junior than cheer him on. Perhaps much of that is out of jealousy – because undoubtedly, Junior cannot be the only person on the reservation who wants “out.” Wow – perhaps I just made a major assumption there…like those who interviewed the Black poet. Interesting, but every one has a dream and many people find it quite hard to believe that everyone’s dream does not include improving ones self beyond the life they were born into – but I am sure there are those people that want to stay right where they are and right where they always have been.
Overall, this book surprised me a great deal and it is a strong piece of literature. The rawness of some of Junior’s comments is unforgettable. The illustrations are entertaining and add to the story. The tale he tells – of going against his family, his tribe, his history, his circumstances, and all he has ever known in order to live a life with a different end result – is an important one for any person who is struggling with their inherited identity and want to go against what is expected because of race, gender, class, or whatever their situation may be.
Realistic fiction is suppose to have a “strong sense of actuality” (Galda 232) and this book has that because it shows all the experiences in life – the good and the bad. This book does not have an “answer” at the end, which also makes it very real or “actual” and the book was stronger realistic fiction for that. There were still questions and loose ends after finishing the novel, allowing the reader to ponder and think for themselves about what is possibly next for the characters, what the future may hold for the characters – and perhaps what the future may hold for the reader. What makes this story impressive as well is that the theme is one most young adults (and some adults) can relate to – where do I fit? You do not have to be a Part-Time Indian to ask that question or feel some of the emotions Junior feels. This book focuses on peer relationships, family relationships, current issues of violence, bullying, and alcohol, as well as current issues of class and race – and it does it all in a realistic, honest manner readers would be able to relate to regardless of their identity.